Yes, he's traded addictions for as long as I've known him. He used alcohol to get off coke, then relapsed, then crack, then used Percs to get off crack, then moved on to OC and heroin, then back to alcohol and Adderall, then back to OC until here we are finally at overuse and abuse of subutex. He has never been completely alcohol and drug free for as long as I've known him. I was fooled into thinking he was a recovered coke addict when I met him and he also barely even drank. Come to find out that I was his drug of choice at that point.
He knows he has a problem, but he's known that for years. He says this is different because he never REALLY wanted to get clean before now, but he doesn't realize I've heard that one before too. I believe him that he wants to get clean (in an abstract sense), but I don't believe that he knows how bad off he actually is. During his brief sobrieties in the past, he was always a smart, insightful guy (or at least fooled me into thinking he understood the damaging effects of his addiction). But, that's long gone. Thats what is making me see that this is likely not the end. I'm giving him this chance to do the right thing so that I can know that I've truly given him every chance (which is quite ridiculous since I've given him 100s of chances already), but this is what I need for me. I need to know that I even gave this much. I was given some advice to pack a bag for me and my daughter before the detox begins, which I intend to do. I've also made some backup plans for a place for us to stay if the s*** hits the fan during the detox itself. Even that is more than I should be doing. I get that.
He tried to go to a detox program a few months ago and was told by the hospital that insurance would only pay if you were detoxing from opiates and even then the detox center's solution is to prescribe suboxone. Since he's asking for a suboxone/subutex detox, that's not going to work. That's when he started going to the psych who planned to wean him down but he lacks the self-control for a slow process that involves taking progressively smaller amounts. Thus, cold turkey at home.
Thanks to everyone whos responded to my questions. I needed the reality check and i appreciate the honesty. I know this has about a 0.1% chance of long term success and only slightly higher percentage for him to even get through the next week without using. I just now have to put my plan in place for my response to this failure. I know he will move out, but that's as far as I've gotten so far.
