((Hope))
I am so impressed with your new attitude! Go ahead and return the responsibility of his life back to him. And spend your energy doing the things that will bring more peace in your life. Don't forget to reward yourself when You accomplish some really annoying task... The more annoying it is, the better the reward!
When I left my AH, he started spouting all kinds of statistics at me (that he said he got from his therapist) about how recovery was so much more likely if the spouse was actively supporting the A. I was thinking at that point that he didn't know what he was asking of me. I was pretty sure he didn't really want the kind of support I was capable of giving at that time. He had gotten me so steaming mad, i had gone NC except for emails. Even then, i only responded to him when he wasnt quacking. I finally Sent him a message explaining that I loved him and that I wished him peace and success in his recovery.
I still hope that for him... But from a distance.
((more hugs!))
Fathom