Hey Duke
I spent 20- years drinking - it took me a while to get to a point where I was happy.
Some of us dig some pretty deep holes - it can take some effort to climb up to the sun again.
I also thought all I needed to do was quit drinking - my life was perfect otherwise.
I also expected change to be massive and instaneous.
Of course I found that wasn't true on either count - and in many ways, not drinking was juts the start not the end.
I'm not saying this to put you or anyone else off - I've bever regretted a minute of my recovery - and things really do get better
stick with it
D