Rant!
I read all these posts from women who are with alcoholics and can't let go. They know they should, they want to (most of the time) but they have trouble doing it. Hell, I WISH I could get away from my A. I do love him, just can't live with him. His drinking has gotten worse and worse. And yet I have to-live with him, that is. We sold everything we had in the U.S. to buy property together in another country. Both our names are on the title so I can't make him leave and he won't go voluntarily. I can't afford to leave and I am unable to legally work in this country. Going back to the U.S. is not an option. I have no job, home, or family there. I do have friends there, but I have friends here too. And I have animals that I love and won't leave behind. For the last 10 months we have been living in separate buildings, sharing the kitchen in the main house. I do my best to take care of and look after myself. I have friends that I spend time with, take a class twice a week, enjoy my animals, work in my garden, attend online meetings, read Alanon literature, come here to SR. I'm doing way better than I was a year ago. But the further I get in my own recovery, the more it makes me want to be away from him. I'm taking things ODAT and trusting in HP to guide me. HP did come through for me recently, I am house-sitting for some friends who are out of the country. I spend three days a week there and four days at home. So at least I get a break sometimes. OK, I'm done ranting now, thanks for ¨listening¨.