Originally Posted by
ady gil 
The bold part here is SO important IMHO. When an active A is "sober" he/she is doing nothing but obsessing about the how, when and where of the next drink. Nothing is important except that next drink. And this information came to me DIRECTLY from my AH's mouth when he was 6 months sober (in a recovery program) at one point - he talked of the compulsion - he was always - yes always thinking about the next drink, he would compulsively get up and start walking to the store, even if he didn't think he wanted the drink. Anyone or anything else was in the way of thinking about the next drink and his only purpose in dealing with anything else was to get it out of the way as soon as possible in order to think about the when where and how of the next drink.
As to what is "quacking" - to me that is the A saying anything and everything to keep things out of his way so he can either get the next drink or obsess about it. It's easier for them to have an enabler so part of the obsession is keeping us around, it has nothing to do with if they even like us or not in my opinion.
Even after my AH told me all that I stayed after two more relapses before I had him move out - I'm a slow learner.
I'm new here but have been around many drunks in life, and I agree with everything you say. I have a good friend who quacks all the time. She is in a chronic state now and quacks most often about her being a victim. She thinks she is incapable of doing many things that she should be capable of, and most of her quacks have to do with that. She quacks in order to control me so that I will do those things for her.
By the way, where is that hilarious, long quacking thread? As I said, I'm new here, but I'd love to post in it.