This might be a tough night for me because my wife went out of town today for work and she travels a lot. Being home alone is when I usually drink out of loneliness and depression. I know that this leads to me being really depressed from the heavy drinking, but I am escaping at night after work until I just pass out. I am determined this time to break the pattern forever. I have reached the point of being sick and tired of being sick and tired all of the time. I am forcing myself to go to a celebrate recovery meeting tonight. I have never been to one of those meetings, but a friend of mine who could not stop drinking for years says that it is a good program. I'm not good at sharing my personal stuff with other people either and this is the first forum I have ever joined, but I am trying some different things now because what I have tried in the past has not worked. Thanks Everyone.