I've changed my actions towards my son to protect myself from his destruction. He knows I will no longer support him and that home can never again be an option for him. He has to figure his life out for himself. I had to take these steps to protect myself.
However, I still have hope. I don't base my happiness on that hope but I also will not give up hope that someday he will lead a healthy, happy life. I see it won't be on my timeline, but, as they say, where there is breathe there is hope and that hope helps me to sleep peacefully every night.