Chakaido, please don't get antsy over TU. That guy is all AVRT, all the time, and he does it so very very well. I owe him a lot, as do many others here.
I hear that you are asking not only about AVRT and sobriety, but you are asking some deeper questions too. For me, I had to get the sobriety solid before any other introspection started to get critical mass, so I recommend the same for you.
A search for meaning in life is a deep and personal introspective journey, Chakaido. I think opening up and becoming deeply aware and mindful is very important, it has been that way for me. I can suggest some mindfulness type reading that has been very very important to me. You can pop me a PM if you'd like a look at my library.
Another thing that has worked for me is the idea of getting out of my own head, working to understand and help other folks from time to time. Chakaido, that is precisely the reason that many of us sober folks hang around here. I wish you the best in your journey.
And Happy Birthday too!