Heh heh, apologies for chuckling, but when I read your post I was reminded of a time in my life not so long ago when I went into a physical rapid detox in a hospital. Before I left I kept a few bottles in the fridge for when I got out!!! as I thought that I would learn how to drink like a normal person, taper it down and when I got home- Hey Presto!, I would be 'back to normal'. Heh heh, crazy ol'Nat brain thinking there
Fortunately that has changed for me.
Now, when I was in detox, I had my spiritual awakening and by day six when I got out I was so petrified of going into my house near the fridge that I got a friend to take the bottles out of the fridge ( I didn't even want to go through the motion of opening a bottle and smelling it and hearing it and looking at it) and asked this friend to put the bottles in the recycle bin (without clanking!) and then put the bin out on the street about five metres up from my house directly under a street light.
I don't particularly find pride helpful , but for me, I knew that my pride (in this case)would always get in the way of me rifling through that bin with the glare of the light shining on me. And in one of those lovely kismet moments, the rubbish was collected that night
I still smile when I think about that time in my life
Anyway, seems like you're actually thinking about what you're doing as opposed to compulsively doing it, so kudos to you! Thanks for sharing.
Luv, Nat.