Well I am taking antabuse every morning. It's kind of a forced sobriety to keep me sober long enough to learn how to do it on my own. I'm planning on using it for a few months, in addition to AA meetings, to get sober time under my belt, and hopefully keep myself committed. It is a dangerous drug though for an alcoholic. You can't drink on it, it can be fatal, so I'd only recommend for someone who is truly committed. But for me it's been a lifesend. I take it every morning, and that's one way to ensure I will not drink today.
Besides that, I'm spending a lot of time thinking over my life. I've wasted the last 5 years of my life being irresponsible and stupid. I've spent too much time sick, hungover, hating every day. I've gained about 70 pounds in the last few years from drinking, I'm one of those that binges after drinking, just adding on more pounds on top of the excess liquid calories I've consumed. Keeping all of that in mind helps me remember what I don't want to go back to.
My plan is to get my life and health back. I spend my time visualizing myself 6 months from now, thinner, healthier, relaxing with a good book in the evening instead of drinking. I can see it, and I know I can do it. I have a good job, and I'm aiming for another one at work when the position comes available. I stand in a good place right now, but I know I'll blow it if I drink. I'm working that much harder at my job and on myself to make my life better.
It helps me to think every day about what improvements I want to make in my life, and then start working towards them. Every day I try to do better than the day before, and every day I end well because I haven't drink. That's a huge success for me.
Focus on the positives and the changes you want to make in your life. Don't dwell on the negatives except to remember what you don't want to go back to. Try to put it behind you, and move with your life without alcohol bringing you down. Reach out for support from family and friends. Stay here on SR chatting with others. It's been very helpful to me. Good luck, I wish you the best. I know you can do it, we all can.