I too agree professional help is needed at times. Here is my experience dealing with a heart breaker.
I have been with a sponsee for the past four years. She relapsed at 2 1/2 years. She stays in the fellowship and mostly stays sober. She has had a couple of one day relapses.
She turned 46 a few days ago. She was diagnosed with lung cancer a little over a year ago. Did a round of chemo. Started another round but it was doing more damage than good. She is now on no cancer meds. Other then she is very thin you would not know she is dying. She still functions pretty well.
She sees a therapist and takes the necessary meds for depression. A minister visits her once a week. She gets tremendous comfort from him. He is young and sounds very cool.
Then there is me. I go to her house once or twice a week. Believe it or not she is out and about frequently, so it is somewhat hard at this point to catch her home. We talk about everything. I listen to her fears. I don't try to fix, I listen. She likes the inventory process and we talk about what she learns in them. She cries sometimes. We laugh. Every visit we end up laughing about something. I enjoy her.
God put us in each other's lives for a reason. I pray for her peace of mind (and my own) if it be thy will. Through the grace of the 12 steps I show up.
I'll pray for BV.