Wanttobe,
I'm glad you are here. When I read the posts there are so many folks out there in the same situation that I am. I believe you will see the same. You're right that we can't make anyone do anything - we didn't cause it, can't control and surely can't cure it. These are adults, although they may be emotionally stunted, they are still adults that should be accountable for their actions just as we are accountable for ours. They aren't children, no matter how much they may act like them. And we are not abandoning them when we say - enough is enough. Rather we are applying "self care" to the only person that we can truly care for - ourselves.
Originally Posted by Wanttobefree
However, I seem to be getting to the point where the rages are not acceptable to me anymore. I know that sounds stupid. What healthy person would live like this? ... I am now looking at him not as a failure as a husband, but as another human being that really needs some help. He is truly miserable. I am a firm believer that forcing someone to do something isn't helpful, but then I remember that if your 2 year old is heading for the street, you don't stand by, watch and do nothing.
You aren't stupid - Lorelai who posts here has a signature that says it all for me - "You did what you knew how to do, and when you knew better you did better..."
Safety is our first priority for ourselves and I hope you will ensure that you have this - today. I am thinking about you and have you in my prayers today.
One day/hour/minute at a time is the best plan for us to follow.
Peace,
Petunia