I'll be...
I just want to mention that I really think being in recovery is about putting the baggage down!! I am in recovery and I hang out with both people in recovery and those who are "normies". To be honest A LOT of those "normies" ask loads of questions about "recovery". That is because recovery is about SOLUTIONS to LIFE PROBLEMS!!
Good recovery is NOT about dragging around baggage! But I do think that it is really healthy to unpack your baggage rather than trying to just put it in the basement.
In recovery and/or therapy you get the help of other peoples perspective as you "unpack" your smelly dirty baggage. Getting other peoples perspective is not the same as having them look at you. The fact is that when we grow up in dysfunctional situations we tend to cram a lot of other peoples stuff in our bags, and we carry around a lot of weight that does NOT belong to us.
The friends and acquaintances that I know in recovery are happy. There is a lot of laughter because of the lightness that they have worked for. We do not stare at each other...we look outward in similar directions...that being forward (with hope, joy, curiosity and interest) rather than backward with anger, guilt, hurt or shame.
acceptance is healing
your fears, worries, concerns, resistance, annoyances, etc., will be accepted by a group of people who have felt so many of the same emotions that you are feeling...and have been able to help each other and become friends in the process.
when I started in recovery I wasn't really interested in that...I just needed to quit drinking because it/I was killing me. but the gift of life is a whole lot bigger than just not picking up the bottle/or engaging in unhealthy behaviors in relationship!!