Fault is one thing.....something that is "within our power" is another. The correlation between the addict and the enabler cannot be over emphasized. Both are dealing with addictions. Both are dealing with a progressive issue. And on it goes until someone takes responsibility for their own actions and changes the dynamic.
We cannot change or control the addict. The addict cannot simply control the disease. However, there are things (actions, reactions, people, places, behaviors, etc) that we CAN control that will arrest the progression of the disease.
I don't think addiction or enabling is an issue of "fault" so much as it is an issue of personal accountability.
gentle hugs
ke