Yez5,
Your post made me cry! I can so understand how you are feeling and just want to let you know you are not alone and offer a virtual HUG.
Time and therapy will help...I know I've been there too. The time thing is the rub......especially when all we want is a quick way to feel some happiness to get us through. It will come - in little bits at first and then build.
Hang in there.....you are really doing well even though you may not feel it to the extent you deserve at the moment.
Sorry about the virus......here's hoping it passes quickly and stays contained....one more thing you don't need on top of everything else.