I dont know what to call this thead
I have been clean and sober 27 years. I have just recently started to have intrusive thoughts of drinking which I promptly remind myself of all I have to lose and use my recovery tools, I also share these thoughts sometiomes as I am doing now. I practice the steps with other alkies who are also dually diagnosed and come here as a good reinforcement and reminder.
Maybe i am just venting- but i havent had these thoughts in a long while- and i do mean long.
I know longer go to AA meetings- I go to Dual Recovery Anonymous. It may sound like an excuse and i dont care- i just no longer feel comfortable in AA since I moved to FL and I have a social anxiety disorder. There is no tolerance for dually diagnosed people in AA. I struggle to separate my alcoholism from my mental illness- they are so intertwined. My mental illness can triggger my alcoholism and vice versa. I also have bipolar, general anxiety disorder related to PTSD.. I know some people will take what Ive said as an opportunity to jump on me and tell me to just get over it and go to AA meetings. I tried that for two years here til I found DRA. There just arent alot of meetings here. I have a sponsor and a therapist. I just needed to reach out and share I guess. People tend to seem me as a "wise old timer" yet I still have alcoholism. I will never be cured. I am being constantly vigilent by trying to share.
Most comments or feedback welcome. Thanks for listening.
Last edited by Mo S; 04-08-2012 at 05:22 AM.
Reason: typos! (as usual)