The 24 Hour-A-Day post by Veritas1 this morning describes our problem quite well..
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...hours-day.html
Read today's Daily Reflections as well and see if you can identify.
I had to have all hope of doing this MY way dashed, I had to come to the point where I was hopeless and had to surrender or die. Hopefully you get there soon and "commit" to AA.
You have to commit to AA, not just be involved.....
The difference is like a bacon & egg breakfast,
The chicken is involved and the pig is committed.
Wishing you the best.
Bob R