Sounds to me like you just did yourself the biggest favor!
If you were in front of me, I would pat you on the back for a job well-done...
Based on what you shared, it appears that he wasn't treating you right...
So, now you're the "bad guy" because you are no longer putting up with his nonsense???
Regardless of whether you did anything wrong or not, it has been my expereience that someone who is active in their addiction will typically blame the other person.
So, you issued some ultimatiums that you didn't follow through on...
You're not the first to do that, and you certainly won't be the last, either....
And, I'm sure you had the best of intentions when you did issue those threats to your boyfriend...
In other words, be gentle with yourself....
You're in recovery now, so as you are beginning to learn, if you present an ultimatum, be prepared to carry it out!
In my experience, it's not uncommon for those who were able to walk all over us beforehand to become a bit ruffled when we start setting higher standards for ourselves...
I wish you the best....
Things may seem tough for you now, but believe me when I tell you, they DO get better!
All the best,
Diva 76