Hi
So I've formally been diagnosed with subclinical hyperthyroidism. For the past two weeks I have not been taking care of my addict who is also very sick. I went twice last week to his place we had plans and he cancelled on me both times after I drove all the way in town.
I still am planning on moving cross country. He and I have had nothing but fights on the phone and I keep hanging up. I cannot stand the way he treats me this condition makes me on edge. He's pretty much blown his 1000 disability in one week and I sense his panic because I think he knows I'm not shelling out any cash this time for him (except I pay his rent and bring him groceries, my rule is NO CASH, which I have never been able to stick to).
He keeps pushing me, "we gotta get ready, we've been slacking on packing to go back east" and yesterday I blew up at him and said "don't include me in that it's your responsiblity to pack your stuff I have 4 times the amount of stuff and no one to help me" I was pretty horrible. He then gave me a 20 minute ultimatum, I either say yes or no to being with him going back east and give him an answer in 20 minutes. He's done this before. Then given me the "you're throwing 16 years down the drain" "you wasted 16 years of my life" etc etc. and "your little stupid thyroid problem is nothing compared to my problems" then he started to say he's dying, at the end of his days and read me everything that's on his disability application about his condition, like I didn't know any of it.
I honestly am not feeling too well, my throat hurts, if I stress out I get heart palps and I'm tired. I can barely work and I haven't been hustling to get contracts, I don't have it in me. I'm living on savings. I can't hustle anymore and everything I make just goes to paying off loans I got to pay for his ****. I'm tired. I don't care. My plan is to camp all summer. I know that sounds hippie but why pay rent for a box I live in when I can just as easily camp. Nothing I've done seems worth it anymore and I just want to go be closer to family.
Not sure what I'm doing anymore.