I am sorry you are going through this. I am too. I was drunk for a week and off of my bipolar meds.
Alcohol causes me so much anxiety- yet I have chosen over and over to go on binges. And it sounds like you are experiencing the aftermath too.
Today is day 1 for me. We can do this together!
Maybe you should also see a doctor/therapist for your anxiety and depression.
Hang in there!