This thread has been a doosey. I bet you seem like you are being pulled in two directions, but you have also had support and some wisdom, as have I, just reading through it.
I am older (but not ancient) so of course my first thought was, “man, here is this wonderful young woman going through this Bull S***. Find a better guy. I know you can, girl. What! No job, and lives with mom at 27, problems with drugs. He better look like Jonny Depp (well, that’s who I would pick). Anyhow, I also understand how love can be, and how you don’t want to leave someone you love; someone who is in recovery if there is the chance that things can be good someday.
With that being said, it seems like one common ground here is that every one advises, myself included, to get help for yourself, do the things you love to do, and take care of you. I hope in following that advice the answers will come to you.
In closing, I have to say that some of these people were, I should say, are key in helping me through my darkest hours, and SR has helped/helps me immensely.