Had a more hopeful job interview today, that is willing to train those w/out experience. Issue is that she had just hired a couple people, but *hopefully* someone will decide they don't want to stay and I can get my foot in that door. I'll keep on trying, and keep in contact with her.
I am SO sore, and I have the worst blister so I did a spinning class w/clogs. Ha. I hope I can workout as well tomorrow b/c that is so important, esp at the beginning of my not drinking.
EQ- I'm sorry you're in such a rough spot, it can be such hell when the in your face DESIRE is so strong. I wish I had better advice, but all I can do is I try to focus on the immediate strongest things I loathe about the most, the disappointment, the phone calls/action I am likely to make intoxicated, having to feel SICK, and the fact that really NOTHING is better by drinking. I can think when "out" I depended on it sooooo heavily b/c of my anxiety, but if there is anything I really feel I need it to "complete" the activity, what good is that for me really. What fun am I having, and why did I believe so strongly I was.
I mean, I still wanted to today, get a shot before the interview. SMART. Being anywhere other then where I'm used to, I get this--but you're not HERE often--it'll just be a bit/today/etc. I think it's just the first go to thought. The calming the frayed nerves immediate, the numbing the edges. It's constant and it's draining.
I have to seemingly relearn SO much, I never quite picked up that nifty concept of coping, and for a long time I am not sure who it was I was playing.
Hugs and all that good stuff.
kam- Totally doing my happy dance for you and the 28! Heck yeah (and I like that phrase, I don't think I've come across it)
olympia- Oh no, I definitely was REALLY irked, ha. Then I got slammed w/the serious stuff but yeah...i've experienced things like that before. When I was really bad off w/ my eating disorder, I'd deal w/some refeeding issues--which is a big eff you when you finally are trying to increase intake/keep everything down. Bodies that have been under stress for some time and having an overload of toxins have some, um..."spring cleaning"?! Heh. I hope you feel better, keep your liquids up and rest as much as possible.
fuaustina- Hey you. I suppose for a long time I even considered myself more of an extrovert then I was. I think it was a role that appealed to me--but that's a whole long sordid story of all my personal issues w/wanting, and needing and avoiding attention all at once. I don't feel it's ok to accept I'll be a hermit forever, but it's a process of figuring out what I want/need. This is a great place and I am able to be much more open and aware and learn so much from SR.
Johnny- I choked on my drink (tea that is!) when I read that, hehe.
(also this reminds me of the endless entertainment cleverbot gives me. and this
AI vs. AI. Two chatbots talking to each other - YouTube)
BoozeFree- Bet you rocked it
Complexiti- More then a job just well done!
<3
~LP, abuser of exclamation marks, among many others, extraordinaire