You can't help him realize he needs help. He needs to realize this on his own and that may take years and years and years.
I would find an Al Anon meeting that addresses you. I feel bad for you, I really do. People don't outgrow drinking, they get much much worse most times. Please for Heavens Sake, don't have children just yet, that won't change things either and he won't become "different" because there are children.
Drinking from 9am til going to bed is not healthy nor is it normal irregardless of the circumstances and stress is never a reason to drink, although many many alcoholics do just that, or I should say that is their excuse for drinking.