Suic
I really think the hardest step in all this is to really admit you are powerless over alcohol and really want to change. That means admitting you are addicted.
I think when I took step one I really deep down didn't believe it but went along with the program because I wanted change. I did change and I know in my heart of hearts that I am an alcoholic. Today I have no desire to drink.
I am so grateful that I came to the realizatin that I am an alcoholic and can't drink ever.
AA and this forum helped me to get there.
CaiHong