Welcome Rex! Maybe this time, unlike all the other times, you will not pick up again. You could be ready for a new life, one without the drama & uncertainty that drinking causes.
I was definitely ready by the time I hit my 50's. I had spent so much precious time trying to be a social drinker. I was never able to control the amounts I drank or how long my binge would last. My body was tired - and I couldn't snap back the way I once had. Plus, if I was honest - it wasn't even a little bit fun anymore. It was becoming dangerous and unpredictable.
I hope you'll continue to read and post here - let us know how you're doing. We care.