Originally Posted by laurie6781

Heard from my XABF after our SECOND time being together 44 years after our first parting of the ways:

"I was this way at 20 years old and I am still the same."

My thought was "No asshat you were not this way back then, you are much worse now, as is your drinking. I'm gone).

Took me ten months of 4 to 6 week visits at a time, to watch and see the 'curtain'+ come down and the 'real' alcoholic behaviors to start to rear their ugly heads.

My last words to him in October 2011 right before I boarded the plane to come home were:

"My boundary is that I cannot be with nor live with a practicing alcoholic. My boundary is that I cannot be with nor live with an alcoholic in recovery until they have at least 3 to years of continuous sobriety using some type of program. My boundary is I cannot be with nor live with someone who lies, and that is all you have done is lie to me. GOOD BYE."

And I boarded the plane.

Now he continued to try and call almost every day for over weeks then went to a couple of times a week, and then to a month or two and now it has been months with no calls from any of his numbers.

Even with all my 'recovery' it still took me 10 months to realize that I was back on the roller coaster. Sheesh

After that, I made the decision that I do NOT need a male companion in my life. My association with A's will only be the ones I sponsor and a few family members that I keep very limited contact with.

I like living alone and only have me and the fur kids to pick up after. I like having my friends not live in my home, lol I am very comfortable with me today.

Love and hugs,