WTBH ... Good on you for putting out your feelings here and trying to work it out for yourself about what are healthy boundaries (or in this case - no contact) issues with your xAH and xMIL.
We ALL stumble and fall even at the best of times... that's how we all grow and learn as human beings. I think you're doing awesome.
Only YOU know your life inside and out with these people and it sounds as though there is some residual emotional rawness, esp. when it comes to your xMIL. And that's NORMAL!!!
It seems as though you were wanting to see if you could salvage an email relationship with them -at least some type of positive connection (and maybe heal old hurts?), but you saw that you couldn't and that it's a bad idea at this time for you to be engaged. -
I'm SO proud of you for trying (you are human, want to think positively of others and that is awesome!!!) and proud of you for now stepping back from it all.
It's interesting to see that the people who joined SR around the same time as I have are experiencing these deep rooted emotions... anger, betrayal, sadness, grief. --- It's a beautiful thing (I know that sounds weird) to see because it's all a part of RECOVERY!!!! And folks, isn't that the best thing we can all get from our experiences, hic-cups, 2steps back etc... to see our growth in the whole scheme of things?!
I think you're doing awesome... emotions are going to keep flooding forth for ya, but keep posting because you've got some great supportive people here who know that it takes time to heal and learn and most importantly, that we all do it differently.
Big BIG hugs to you!!!