Curmudgeon, Electrical Engineer, Guitar God Wannabe
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Where the mighty arms of Atlas hold the heavens from the Earth
Posts: 3,403
Aftereffects of Emotional Abuse :gaah
It's funny...
It's only now I can look back at my time with my XAGF and see it for what it truly was: emotional abuse. Unapologetic emotional abuse.
Of course, I didn't see it clearly while going through it. But the events in my life from 3 weeks ago have made things very, very clear. She didn't care how her behavior adversely affected my life. And it did: academically, professionally, emotionally. The only thing that mattered to her at any given moment was what she wanted at any particular moment in time. And when I wasn't willing or able to provide it, she sought and got it somewhere else.
What's weird for me is it's so shocking that I'm not sure what to feel about it, except for relief that it's over. The sadism is what's striking. It's antithetical to how I believe we treat each other. It's antithetical to what Al Anon, Nar Anon or AA/NA promotes.
All beings fear pain. All beings fear violence. If we see ourselves in our brothers and sisters, how can we wish them harm?
My eyes are looking forward. But I have a feeling once I start processing all the different feelings and emotions, it's going to be pretty overwhelming.
Hope everyone's doing well.