Peter G

Do you consider attending a concert with an open bar "trying hard to stay sober"? Because it's not. Full stop.

Don't get me wrong, please. I'm not trying to be clever here. It's just that at around 2 weeks sober I went to a concert also - only went because it was planned long before I got sober and I didn't want to upset any feelings from those who expected me to go. In fact, everything told me not to go. Every hair on my neck said "you're a bloody idiot if you walk out the door", none-the-less, off I went.

I didn't drink (which is an absolute miracle) but I could have so easily, to the point that as soon as I got there I had booze handed to me. Thankfully my wife was there and I passed it off, in fact my wife got smashed on all the drinks that I had to quietly pass off so my friends would be offended. I gotta say... every moment I spent at that show, watching all my friends getting pi$$ed, smelling the weed in the air, and feeling the all to familiar alcoholic vibe of being at a live venue again... Jesus... Getting out of there without drinking was like building a rocketship to Mars from scratch, in a rowboat, wearing a blindfold. Hard as hell.

It took only that 1 experience to tell me not to tempt the devil again, so I didn't for around a year. I'm a working musician, made my living in nightclubs and concerts since my 18th birthday. I'm 44 now. Guess what? I stayed unemployed for over a year after experiencing that. Turned down some real serious money as well during that time. Why? Because my frikin life depended on staying sober, nothing less, and I knew that while I was still learning how to cope with life sober, being around booze was about as dumb as entering a foot race with a box of rocks tied around my ankles. And besides that, every sober musician I asked told me that they'd still be drunks (if not dead) had they not taken a breather from "the life" long enough to get their ducks in a row.

You know that Nietzsche quote that talks about staring into the abyss long enough that it stares back at you? Amigo, if you haven't ever heard of that quote, you definitely experienced the meaning behind it at that concert.

Just MHO and advice having a long time (25 years) as a practicing pi$$tank, but you'd do well to see that without a solid program of recovery and some time under your belt working through said program, being in the proximity of booze is what a few in my group like to call Obvious Fail #1.

Stick close to your study group. I recommend Rational Recovery also. I use both and between the 2 I've been sober for longer than I have been since puberty. Make a plan to stay the hell out of Dodge, in other words DON'T go near the parties, clubs, or any place that you would normally drink at... until you're confident enough in your program and you've developed tools and strategies that can be employed the minute it gets squirelly. Again, just MHO.