I am up to the big plan part and almost definitely dont think im ready for my own big plan.
I find it dogmatic and irrational.
Maybe I wont mind my beast having a little feed sometime in the future.
Currently Im finding it more useful whenever I think about taking drugs again to just remind myself how bad I felt to even things out.
White-knuckling for the win!
Dogmatically saying 'im not taking it just cos' I dont think is a good rational basis for abstinence.
oh my beast my beast!
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The big plan has definately triggered strong beast acitvity but im not sure im ready for the final showdown with it yet.