When I first came here, I was just looking to find out if anyone else had quit oxys cold turkey and survived. Then I found out how not-unique I really was. How I got addicted, why I stayed that way for awhile, and then what I went through to quit.
I've stuck around for a year plus, thinking maybe now I can be the person who helps others who come here with the same questions I had.
I've discovered I can't really help most addicts. I've discovered you really can't convince someone else to quit.
It's very simple, really. Until getting and staying clean becomes more attractive to you than using feels to you now, you aren't going to quit your drug. You may think you are "clean" when you don't use for awhile, but until you've made the decision to be a non-drinker and non-substance-abuser, you are merely a user in the agonizing state of suspended animation called "sober" or "clean" or whatever term you want to use for the substance not being in measurable levels in your blood.
In other words, you are still just a user who has paused momentarily. Nothing more, nothing less. Not bad, not good.
I hope eventually you'll grow tired of waking up dope sick and spending your life either thinking about, seeking, using, coming down, and then repeating the whole pattern over and over and over and over and over again.
Life's a whole lot better when you don't live like that.
I wish I could help you.
FT