So sorry to hear you are hurting ... yes it is a tough time of transition newly sober and changing dynamics.
Are you both in recovery? Counseling? This is key to establishing new healthy boundaries and communication skills about the past, present and future... at least that has been my overwhelming personal experience and knowledge of other successful couples.
Alcoholism, recovery, healing broken relationships are all complicated subjects independently and you are dealing with all three at once!
What would you normally do? Does he always call first?
I can't give you advice except that it would be very good to get with an alanon group and get a good therapist who is an addictions expert to help you navigate the next few months and beyond... and read, read, read the suggested books in the stickies at the top of the forum.
Good luck and visit often...