I just wanted to say I am sorry for what you are going through. I met my boyfriend when he was 10 mos ino his recovery and we started seriously dating after a month. He has now been clean a little over 18 months. He living in a sober living environment and attends IOP 3 nights a week as well as 3 NA meetings a week and an individual counseling session a week. He drug of choice was heroin. He tells me often of people getting kicked out of his house as well as iop (weekly) for having dirty urines. I know that the possiblity of him having a relapse is high, but I can't let that fear keep me from supporting him an havig him as an active part of my life and my sons. If your husband is serious about his recovery then he can do it. He actually does need regular interaction with other addicts in recovery regularly because they can help him understand things that you or I can't since we are not in recovery. I believe you should support your husband as he needs your love and support, but I also believe that you should try (even though I know its hard for me sometimes) to allow him to make is own choices on how to work his recovery. FOr me I don't see an addict in recovery when I look at my boyfriend even though I know he is, I see a wonderful loving man and I think in some way that actully helps him as he doesn't feel me judging him or scrutinizing his every move or decision. Protect yourself and your daughter first then love and support your husband. It can work.
Good luck and I am here if you need to talk or vent.