I'm no expert but it might be that you are being extremely loyal -before they deserve it.
You might be confusing loyalty with falling in love. Loyalty to our alcoholic is given whether they deserve it or not. We sometimes think if can work hard enough through our loyalty (physically or emotionally) then they will really love us and not leave us, leave us emotionally, spiritually, or even physically.
These men all "LIKE" you and so you take it to the next level with your loyalty proving to them how much you love them. They need to deserve your loyalty and love BEFORE you give it.
Because we have given our loyalty to our alcoholic parent we are sometimes not good judges as to who else to give our loyalty and love to. These men have demonstrated that they were not deserving of your love or loyalty.
Consider trying to back off and not falling in love with someone until they have proven their loyalty to you first. Guard your feelings until you are sure.