Cocaine Timeline
Dear SRC users,
I would like to briefly share my experiences using cocaine. Although I've flirted with coke off and on since college, it never became a problem or issue until almost 8 years later in the summer of 2009. From about July 2009 - Jan 2010 (over a six month period) I would say I developed a very real cocaine habit. It didn't take long for cocaine to become the primary mode of liesure on the weekends and my main outlet to relax and socialize. I was also socialized to ying yang cocaine with alcohol in a bar/pub environment where we smoked cigs inside, played pool and video poker. In a few months I was sniffing about a gram or more about once a week. 2010 signaled my return to law school. Sadly, I took my newfound coke habit with me. Almost immediately, I started missing classes, going to school late, or tired, missing deadlines for scholarships and internships. During this time, I began using coke sporadically - sometimes as a weekend drug but more and more often as an "anytime" drug. My spring 2010 semester was hellish! Once I did coke on a Sunday or Monday - the rest of the week was a painful and slow recovery period, never really hitting my groove with school work, papers, or other projects. When you have that much of an intellectual load on your shoulders (i.e. law school) one sleepless night as a result of a night of cocaine binging can just break you down for the rest of the weak. The summer of 2010 was basically a period of serious reflection and change. I was clean for over a month during which time I worked out, lost weight, gained muscle and overall enhanced my affirmation of life. I became involved with a nice girl who also was a law student. She was aware of my struggle and was a positive influence. Although I slipped here and there, and spent hundreds of dollars on cocaine, somehow it seemed like I was to eventually ween myself off the drug. The fall/winter of 2011 my brightest period of abstinence. Clean for 5 weeks, then 7 weaks. All this with no support or NA or treatment mind you. Sadly though from November of 2011 to Dec 2012: a one year period: my cociane use has increased 10 fold! I now have been using on a daily or every other day basis for at least 4 -5 months. Just 3 weeks ago I sniffed an over 3 grams of coaine over a 7 hour period. No amount seems to satisfy except when occasionally you are so sick of/from it that you just don't need more! Anyways - I have gone through a rough a turbulent journey of cocaine addiction for over 2.5 years I don't want to hit my 3 year anniversarry! I have pawned jewelry, fallen into credit card debt, wasted hard earned paychecks, and time and energy on coke. At the end of the day, material things can be regained and credit and so on can ultimately be fixed - but you never get the time back. Cocaine addiction for me is very cyclical. I don't expect my life to become great without coke, just go back to normal but with greater inner strength, peace and forgiveness.
Thank you for reading,
Free2012