Boundaries Lost
Well I had read several books on codependency, self image, alcoholism, etc and was all geared up for being strong this holiday. But we went to her family's place, out-of-state, and it was three days of family drinking, late nights and personal migraines. I was the defacto designated enabler/driver. (It's so nice to be needed!) Maybe I OD'd on H2O but I just don't get it... when she gets drunk, I get the migraines! At least this time she waited to get back to where we were staying before passing out.
She suggested to me, on the way home last night, that maybe I shouldn't be with her if I didn't like her getting drunk. Sure...that's right! I shouldn't be with her. But but I'm emotionally invested in this 15 year relationship and I like her and her family. It's the damn drinking that is miserable. She had blackouts each night and she forgot things she did in just five minutes. But no one else in the family who sees this behavior seems to care or think it's a problem. Well, at least there were no fights or arguments this weekend.
This is going to be a difficult year coming up.