Welcome Lalonder,
I totally understand where you are coming from. When my best friend suggested I had a drinking problem and should give up. I thought don't be crazy my life is hard enough as it is without adding to my problems by giving up drink. It is the only way I can cope, it is the only thing that makes me happy.
Over 6 months sober I can't believe how crazy I had got through the drinking. My attitude has changed 180 degrees.
I hope for your sake you decide that you do have a problem and the best way to deal with that problem is to stop drinking but only you can come to that realization. We are all here for you if you make that choice and will support you.
All the best
Merry Christmas
CaiHong