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I think this is the first time Ive posted without being drunk or have been drunk or trying not to kill myself over things I've done. Haven't had a drop in a couple months. Here's the thing... I've been diagnosed with Bipolar 2 by my reg Doctor, my therapist and a Pysch. Now I know what your thinking... It's just a binge drinker using another excuse, but I dont plan on drinking again, and hopefully with the therapy, and right meds I will even out and not go off on some crazy ass weekend, spend all my cash, drink till I drop then be so depressed over it I want to die... My therapist said my past reads like a history of misdiagnosed bipolar disorder. I was depressed before the drinking started, and I could drink normal for long stretches at a time then out of no where just go off crazy drinking and spending money like a fish then be severely depressed for doing it. I'm not going to put all the blame on the bipolar disorder but it does answer after all these years of knowing something was wrong in my head and not being able to grasp what was wrong with me.

Well maybe this isnt the right place to post this but I just wanted to give anyone that has known me over the years an update. And know this, it hasnt been a cake walk since being diagnosed. Not about the drinking part, I could care less for a drink, wife's beer in the fridge right now. The meds for bipolar are terrible compared to the normal anti depressants, the side effects are awful, I cant work, bills are piling up, but hopefully with the help and support of my family I can get back to normal some day. Thanks all for listening. Love each and every one of you... (Now certified crazy) Bless all.. Searching