Originally Posted by anvilhead

I'm just a 36-year old mother of 2 who is struggling right now and I want to do the best I can do for my family.

the very best thing YOU can do is get sober and stay sober. YOU make the decision to NOT drink anymore, ever, and then do whatever it takes to back that up. then it won't matter if he doesn't "understand" - you have simply made the choice to NOT drink. period. that also takes the "why can't you just stop?" question off the table.

make your sobriety your priority. and if he chooses, he can follow suit with reading, learning, attending Alanon.