Welcome Hopeless, you are in a place where everyone understands what you are going through as we are all there or have been through it. I'm not going to offer advice on what you should be doing but I will share some information and experience.
A couple of saying you will see around here. "Let go or be dragged" and "Alcoholics don't have relationships they take hostages".
My experience of being married to an alcoholic for 36 years is that it will just get worse. And as it got worse I was just drug down with it. There was nothing I could do to get her to stop drinking or stop the pills or stop the toxic behavior. I had no control over her and since I turned my life over to making her better I had no control over my life. I ended up in a very dark and ugly place.
Luckily I found this site and this site lead me to al-anon. In both of these places I met people who had been where I was and turned their lives around. Some with their alcoholics and some with out. By going to al-anon and reading and posting here, a lot, I got better as well. I now have a recovery program for me and it works. I am centered and happy and content. My life is worth living again and I am spending time living it. If you look around the site you will find a lot of other people just like me who have changed their lives and are working a recovery.
I would strongly recommend going to Al-Anon. Al-Anon is for the friends and family of alcoholics and will teach you how to focus on your self and work your recovery. It is not for the alcoholic nor is it for you to help the alcoholic to stop drinking. It is for you.
Please keep posting and let us know how things are going.
Your friend,