Great thread.
I too feel like I initially had it "together", but then ended up in a therapist office when I was in my mid-thirties.
I think my ACA traits just couldn't sustained me for a long period of time. I tried throwing myself into work/school, I was a huge people pleaser, tried to control people & situations, gossiped, got pulled into drama, etc.
All of these behaviors simply served as a distraction for my underlying problems. Since I wasn't truly addressing the source of my pain, my coping mechanisms worked less.
I'm thinking that codependency is probably a progressive illness as well (just like alcoholism). The longer it is left untreated the worse your symptoms become.
Thanks for letting me share.
db