Your children are the true victims, they really do not have a good life, they have the life they must accept as "Good", you are their voice, their future, and you are playing "Lets Pretend".
I do not know a whole big bunch in life, however, I do know what it is like to live in the home of an alcoholic, I also know that if you keep your addict as your priorty, your children will suffer, as they will carry their childhood into adulthood.
Hopefully, someday you will reach your bottom and get help for your codependency and do the right thing for your children.
I do wish you the best, life is what you make of it, you will either drive the car or ride in the back seat, so far, he is the driver.