Originally Posted by lulu70
[snip]
I think I might be having some sort of identity crisis. I don't really want to drink, but at least when I was drinking I knew who I was--I was a drunk. Now I don't know what I want. I am irritable and discontent. On the outside, I think I look like I am holding it all together, but on the inside I feel like I am falling apart.
[snip]
Well, the problem is I have been feeling like an alien in ALL situations lately. I DO NOT want to go back to drinking--I was an obnoxious drunk.
You were defining yourself by your behavior. I am sure you were more than a drunk. And I'm sure that now you are more than a former drunk. That's the problem with labels. When we take one off, we get uncomfortable until we can find another one to put on.
Our lives don't completely revolve around alcohol. Maybe you can tell us what you are, what matters to you, and what interests you. What
does make you content in your life? What would you like to be more effective at? We can define ourselves by what we do, who we're related to, what and who we take care of, what we excel at, what we believe, and more.
I've never met anyone who was just a drunk. That may be the behavior they're exhibiting most clearly and obnoxiously, but there's always more to the story than just that behavior. The best simile I can give is to the way leaves turn color in the fall: the green chlorophyll drains out, leaving the bright underlying pigments that were always there. We just couldn't see them before. Your other facets can now be visible.
And to date I haven't met an alien, but I think they mostly land in the southern states. Then again, there's a theory that in California we're
all aliens.
Don S