Welcome,
So glad you found your way here, Milly is right, it's not your fault, don't let him convince you otherwise.
I have been having a rough week too and people have come out to support me so now I have energy in reserve to help someone else.
So heres a big hug for you!BIG HUG
You need a shoulder I have two, you can have either one, both have been patched up by the ortho docs but they are still strong enough to lean on.
Vent away, I find just typing here, and knowing people are listening is a tremendous help.
If you want to talk I will be glad to listen, if you would rather send a private message then that's ok to.
You will be in my thoughts, best of luck to you.
Bill