I want to share a story with you and hopefully I can give the condensed version.
I was in treatment met a guy his name was Dale. He ended up getting kicked out for what I thought was a pretty bogus reason, he was late coming back from a pass. So I took on his cause and I left with him.
The red flags were there from the start as he took me on a trip to Seattle for my b-day left me in a motel all night by myself while he was out with some girl who he was smoking crack with and I had to hitchhike home. Now you would have though that alone would have ended our relationship.
We stayed together for 7 years and some of it was awesome we were in the rooms of NA and we were the perfect little couple. Every 4th of July we went to Courdelane and got a motel w/hot tub in room. We would climb up this mountain and watch the fireworks.
We also took a road trip to Big Sur and went through the redwood forest but 1/2 way through the trip he got wasted on Mad Dog and it turned into another nightmare.
The last few years I went into drugs and got addicted to Heroin well he stayed w/the alcohol mostly so we were going separate ways. He cheated several times. I left 4 or 5 times before I left for good. I was what I thought so in love with him cause he got me and he stuck by me when everyone else was gone. It was a connection I felt no one understood.
He died a 10 years ago complications due to drinking. He was in and out of rehab hospitals. Very sad and I still miss him and have been single since his death.
It was a very dangerous and toxic relationship but on the flip side it was also one of the most loving ones.
Thank God I am sober and have been since May 04, but its only God's grace I lived through all of our in & outs of recovery. He would relapse then I would. He would get sober and I would relapse.
I don't know the answer for you, I am just hoping that maybe my story might prevent you some of the pain we put each other through.
I just want to end saying that our disease loves drama and chaos anything to take the focus of of our recovery.
Last edited by newby1961; 11-14-2011 at 08:18 AM.
Reason: changed wording