Jester1025

I first discovered SR almost exactly two years ago. Back then, the support that I received from everyone on this site was amazing, and it helped me stay sober for about 17 consecutive days. However, I eventually relapsed and resorted to my typical habits: 12-15 beers a night, 5-6 days a week. I stopped visiting SR. Stopped seeing my addiction counselor. And now here I am, 2 years later... an absolute mess. I have decided once again that enough is enough. I would really like to quit drinking completely and learn how to live a sober life. But I am so afraid. My recreational "life" has revolved around activities that involve drinking for so many years now. I just don't know what other types of things I can do that will occupy my time without drinking. When I tried this two years ago, I did very well for awhile, but then I eventually grew bored and frustrated and reverted back to my old ways. I am looking for help once again because I am really struggling right now. Today is day 3, and I feel terrible. I felt so depressed and weak when I woke up this morning. I could barely get out of bed. I called in sick to work this morning because I just feel so drained and weak. Believe it or not, calling in sick is a rarity for me. Even though I drink all of the time, I hardly ever call in sick... only once in the past year. However, today my mind and body must still be in withdrawal mode because I just feel really bad. I really hope that I start feelng better soon because I want to try to stay sober this time. I am so sick and tired and ashamed of the life that I have been living. Any help and support would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.