honey...you need to lighten up on yourself. i agree...actions speak louder than words. i get a feeling that you are actually trying to reassure yourself. i could be way wrong with this but, you dont need to worry about what others are thinking about you. you cant control that...and throwing out a few disclaimers here and there wont make them think differently. they are watching and enjoying a sober you. thats what counts...not what your perception of their thoughts is. be kinder to yourself. if you have no thoughts or temptations....be grateful! good luck and good love....mags