I think it depends on the spouse/partner. My husband, though one of my biggest enablers, also took a very hands off approach to my recovery and we have never really 'talked' about it, other than him mentioning he's proud of me when I hit each year mark. I attribute this to two things.. one, he cannot understand alcoholism, so he honestly assumes all has been well since the day I quit and hasn't even considered that I'd go back to where I was. Two, he's an incredibly forgiving and positive person by nature, and again only assumes the best in most situations. That's all well and fine, but I remember early on wondering endlessly how he felt, if HE needed to 'recover' from my issues, etc.. but as time has gone on, my drinking career has just become a thing of the past that we shrug about and move on with our lives.
I do remember feeling the need to reassure people in my life back when I was on more shaky ground and unsure of how well I was doing myself.