My advice is not to go to Portland.
You've already given yourself permission to drink there.
I also think you were very lucky with the driving, as was everyone else on the road. These forums are full of people who were not so lucky, GOS.
I think you need to do some serious thinking about what it is you want.
You sound a lot like old me - I wanted to drink and not have the consequences...I wanted to drink, but just a little.
If you're a drinker like me, you need to accept those things are just not possible.
D