And when I say:
I'm aware that I'm probably being hypervigilant, but he's living with us after putting our kids in danger and he isn't contributing anything to the household but some cooking and household chores. I can do without both the danger and the maid work. I'm at a point where I don't want him present without making a verbal commitment to some ground rules for our home and our relationship, and I feel like he's completely avoidant of having these conversations or making any compromises.
I've had the opportunity to tell him exactly what I feel a couple of times, but he literally has nothing to say in return. Just silence. Yesterday I realized that I think he's scared of me. He tries to communicate but comes back with statements like, "I'm sorry you feel that way," which again, feels so dismissive and invalidating.
Am I expecting to get water from an empty well?